So after going numero uno at work, I look down to get ready to pull up my black pansu…
and couldn’t find it.
I can’t tell you how confused I was for about 10 seconds. There was slight panic.
Thoughts and weird scenarios ran through my head:
Did I forget to wear it? Did I choose to go Commando? No… wait. I remember putting a pair on and admiring my butt in the mirror earlier that morning.
Did I take it off some time between putting it on and getting to work? I do that sometimes… Don’t you?
Did I accidentally wear the edible ones and it disintegrated from the heat of my ass? Pretty sure I don’t own any.
Did Happosai, the perverted pansu thief from Ranma 1/2, appear out of thin air and snatch it when I wasn’t looking? Yeah, that’s it… That dirty fuck.
I KNOW! I’m pretty sure the boyfriend somehow telepathically teleported ’em. Check his pockets. Right? Impossible. Scratch that idea.
Where the hell did it go?
I look again. The damn thing blended in with my black pants and got lost in the mix.
My heart rate regulated and the color returned to my face. I look around as if there could have been a witness to one of my derp-ist moments of all time.
No one? Cool.